Is it time to give teenagers more support?
Recent reporting shows almost a quarter of teenage girls in the UK could potentially have self-harmed in the past twelve months. Whilst the government is pledging £300 million to schools, to help them deal with teenage mental health issues, is it not the root of the problem that needs to be tackled to avoid future mental health problems rather than a sticky plaster approach?
Hypnotherapist Ailsa Frank helps clients to change their mindset and feel more confident about themselves. “Parents and schools focus too much on achieving and not enough on learning how to relax so pupils can deal with life in a balanced way. Confidence comes from being good at things so it is important that each child develops their own unique set of skills which will help them to feel worthy and set them up with self-esteem moving into the workplace.”
Ailsa says “What people are craving is mindless activities to pass time in the real world, not in the digital one. Cooking uses a multitude of skills. Parents can think it is too much hassle to let kids make a mess in the kitchen but learning to cook from a young age builds confidence and is relaxing.”
We could be seeing a rise in stress in young people from piling too much pressure on children from junior school age. Government policies and parents need to step back and look at what can be done to make school life and home life more balanced.
“Having worked with many children over my years as a therapist I can sum up that the main problem is children never really feel themselves at home or in school. Children are highly creative with wonderful ideas most of the time their uniqueness is being masked.
School for many pupils could be seen as the equivalent of an adult being trapped in a bad job for ten years which they can’t get out of. A school needs to be more interesting and relevant to the real world with career opportunities being discussed at a much early stage to inspire children as to why they are studying. Schools need to take a leaf out of the pages of the Scouts and Guides encouraging children to achieve skills and rewarding with badges.”
It is easy to blame social media and magazines for the crisis amongst young people, but if pupils were fully confident in themselves because of the education they were receiving they wouldn’t be taking social media seriously. It is a combination of factors causing problems with youngsters and giving them a chance to use their own initiative would help. Saturday jobs give responsibility and transition youngsters into the workplace.
4 tips to help teens relax
Let teens make fresh chicken nuggets. Dip strips of raw chicken into some plain flour to coat, then dip into beaten egg and then roll in breadcrumbs and fry in a little oil in a pan for 3 minutes each side. Place on a baking tray and bake for 20 minutes in an oven 180c, 350f, gas 4.
Celebrate every day with a colour paper napkin at family mealtimes. Don’t wait for birthdays to celebrate, enjoy every day. Use mealtimes to discuss everyone’s day including what the parents did, so children develop the ability to listen, be interested in others and realise that parents matter too.
Write down your problems so you take them out of your head. The write-down solutions to each problem to help resolve things.
Then learn to coach yourself into finding solutions. Standing with an upright posture say out loud “I can get through this. I can find solutions. I am amazing just like everyone else is amazing too. I am enjoying this phase of my life. I am building my own unique skills.” By using positive language with a more confident posture you can quickly change your state of mind and re-program a more confident muscle memory.
